Note: Today’s article is adapted from an article published in Forbes Magazine.

I added my two bits when I thought it appropriate and cut the length to fit my space.

Communication, customer service, and driving have something very much in common. Everybody thinks they are good at these skills when, in fact, very few are even adequate with any consistency.

This overestimation of our communication abilities is magnified when interacting with people we are familiar with.

In a recent study, researchers paired subjects with people they knew well, and then again with people they’d never met. The researchers discovered that people who knew each other well understood each other no better than people who’d just met! Even worse, participants frequently overestimated their ability to communicate, and this was more pronounced with people they knew well.

When communicating with people we know, we make presumptions about what they understand—presumptions that we don’t dare make with strangers. This tendency to overestimate how well we communicate (and how well we’re understood) is so prevalent that psychologists have a name for it: Closeness-Communication Bias.

“I know what I am talking about, so you must know what I am talking about. This human shortcoming can prove fatal when dealing with new clients with complicated travel itineraries.

Taking Action

Communication is a real asset when it comes to travel management. You simply can’t become an efficient consultant until you are become a great communicator. Great communicators inspire people. They create a connection that is real, emotional, and personal. And great communicators forge this connection through an understanding of people and an ability to speak directly to their needs in a manner that they are ready to hear.

The seven strategies that follow will help you overcome the communication bias that tends to hold us back with everyone we encounter.

1. Talk so people will listen.

Great communicators read their audience (groups and individuals) carefully to ensure they aren’t wasting their breath on a message that people aren’t ready to hear. Talking so people will listen means you adjust your message on the fly to stay with your audience (what they’re ready to hear, and how they’re ready to hear it).

2. Listen so people will talk.

A disastrous temptation is to treat communication as a one-way street. When you communicate, you must give people ample opportunity to speak their minds. If you find that you’re often having the last word in conversations, then this is likely something you need to work on.

3. Connect emotionally.

Maya Angelou said it best: “People will forget what you said and did, but they will never forget how you made them feel.” This is difficult for many agents to pull off because they feel they need to project a certain persona. Let that go. To connect with your people emotionally, you need to be transparent. Be human.

4. Read body language.

No matter how good a relationship you have with your clients, you are kidding yourself if you think they are being totally open with you.

You must become adept at understanding unspoken messages. The greatest wealth of information lies in people’s body language. The body communicates nonstop and is an abundant source of information, so purposefully watch body language during meetings and casual conversations.

5. Do your homework.

A little preparation goes a long way toward saying what you wanted to say and having a conversation achieve its intended impact. Don’t prepare a speech; develop an understanding of what the focus of a conversation needs to be (in order for people to hear the message) and how you will accomplish this.

6. Skip the jargon.

The travel industry is filled with jargon and metaphors that are harmless when people can relate to them. Problem is, most agents overuse jargon and alienate their customers with their “business speak.” Use it sparingly. if you want to connect with your people.

7. Practice active listening.

Active listening is a simple technique that ensures people feel heard. To practice active listening:

• Spend more time listening than you do talking.
• Avoid finishing other people’s sentences.
• Focus more on the other person than you do on yourself.
• Reframe what the other person has said to make sure you understand him or her correctly
• Think about what you’re going to say after someone has finished speaking, not while he or she is speaking.
• Never interrupt.

Bringing It All Together

As you work to employ these strategies, try to avoid biting off more than you can chew. Work on one to three strategies at a time.

Once you become effective in one strategy, you can take on another one in its place. Communication is a skill that is intertwined with most of what you do each day. Start improving your abilities today.

Mike Marchev is always looking for a few more proactive travel professionals to join his Sales and Marketing Club, mike@mikemarchev.com.

*** You want more to think about? Check out my weekly podcast (Miked Up Marchev). Also listed on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google, and iHeartRadio.